{"id":454,"date":"2020-03-26T14:22:26","date_gmt":"2020-03-26T14:22:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/?p=454"},"modified":"2020-09-08T12:56:51","modified_gmt":"2020-09-08T11:56:51","slug":"emotional-abuse","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/emotional-abuse\/","title":{"rendered":"What is Emotional Abuse?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u201cMy husband constantly calls me names, mocks me, ignores what I have to say, humiliates me in front of the family and then pretends as if nothing has happened and goes on to laugh and enjoy the dinner that I cooked for him and his family with so much effort and love. He is constantly on the phone with others and when I ask anything about anything, he looks away and carries on doing what he was doing. I was never a part of any major decision making. It is as if I don\u2019t have a brain to think and I am not capable of understanding and dealing with situations. As if I don\u2019t even deserve to know what is going on.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Rima finally found the courage to share this horrifying experience that was happening to her every single day in the past 3 years, the response she got was:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut has he ever hit you? If he does not hit you, it\nis not that bad. Just deal with it.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The friend is wrong<\/strong>!! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\nis just as bad, if not worse: \u201cKnives and axes flash like day, harsh words\nhowever always stay<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rima was being emotionally and psychologically abused for almost 3 long years before she finally realized IT WAS NOT OKAY<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What is Emotional Abuse?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A definition of emotional abuse is “any act\nincluding confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization,\nor any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and\nself-worth.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is a painful\nand serious pattern of abuse in which the primary effort is to control someone\nby playing with their emotions for which proper relationship counselling <\/strong>should be taken. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Emotional abuse can happen in a wide range of\nrelationship dynamics:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Romantic Partners<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Husband – Wife<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Parent – Child<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Employer –\nEmployee<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Business\nPartners or Team Members <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2022 Teacher –\nStudent<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, it can thus be said that any relationship can have the aspect of emotional abuse, and no one should be okay with it, no one should accept it. It should be dealt with, and not by accepting it as a way of life, rather to fight it and get rid of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Signs and Symptoms to identify Emotional Abuse: <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unlike\nphysical abuse, where the bruises, the broken bones, the band-aids are visible,\nEmotional Abuse<\/strong> has the aspect of being sneaky and sometimes even\nsubtle. It can take many shapes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A\nfew symptoms to keep an eye out for are:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. Undermining your self-esteem:\n<\/strong><\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    – Verbal aggression<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Calling derogatory names<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Repeatedly questioning one\u2019s character<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Screaming for no apparent reasons<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Embarrassing one in public<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Dismissing everything one says as trivial or completely\nignoring him<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Making fun of how one looks<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Looking down upon one\u2019s achievements and not consider\nthem worthy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Constantly belittling oneself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    – Questioning one\u2019s self worth<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    • Having unrealistic and\nunreasonable demands:<\/strong><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

      – Expecting one to put everything aside and meet unreal\nneeds<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      – Demanding to spend all the time together<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      – Being unhappy and dissatisfied no matter what and how\nmuch one does<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      – Expecting one to always agree with him<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      – Refusing to accept one\u2019s view of the world<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      • Constant Condemnation and\nCriticism:<\/strong><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

        – Persistently blaming oneself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Criticising oneself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Ranking and comparing with others<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Lecturing one about every behaviour and pointing it out\nas incorrect<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Making one and his opinions feel small and trivial<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Sarcastic and unpleasant comments<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Not letting one feel independent<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Preventing one from taking steps to stand on his own feet<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Humiliating one in public<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – intimidating and bullying oneself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        – Punishments or threats of punishments<\/p>\n\n\n\n

        • Gaslighting:<\/strong><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

          – Manipulating the truth, leading one to doubt his own\nemotion, feelings and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

          thoughts, even his sanity<\/p>\n\n\n\n

          • Isolation:<\/strong><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

            – Withholding affection<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Being indifferent to one\u2019s emotions<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Blaming one of always overreacting<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Accusing one of being too sensitive, or too emotional<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Limiting one\u2019s freedom of movement<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Preventing one from meeting his family members and\nfriends<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Neglecting one emotionally<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Reducing conversation with oneself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Limiting the conversation to need base only<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            – Refusing to communicate at all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

            Emotional abuse in children\ninclude:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

            • Humiliating or constantly criticising a child. <\/li>
            • Threatening, shouting at a child or calling them names<\/li>
            • Making the child the subject of jokes, or using sarcasm to hurt a\n child<\/li>
            • Blaming and scapegoating<\/li>
            • Making a child perform degrading acts<\/li>
            • Not recognising a child’s own individuality or trying to control\n their lives<\/li>
            • Pushing a child too hard or not recognising their limitations<\/li>
            • Exposing a child to upsetting situations, like domestic abuse or\n drugs<\/li>
            • Failing to promote a child’s social development<\/li>
            • Not allowing them to have friends<\/li>
            • Persistently ignoring them<\/li>
            • Being absent<\/li>
            • Manipulating a child<\/li>
            • Never expressing positive feelings and warmth to the child<\/li>
            • Emotionally neglecting the child by never showing them emotions<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

              An emotionally abused child may lack confidence, find it difficult to manage their emotions, have issues with making friends or maintaining friendships, act out of or not behave according to age.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

              How to deal with Emotional Abuse?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

              Establish clear boundaries:<\/strong> Communicate a clear set of boundary with the abuser which should be\nintently followed. Be firm in this and stick to one\u2019s decision.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

              Stop self-blame<\/strong>: Very often, people who are being emotionally abused start thinking\nthat it is their fault, and they must have done something wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

              Build a support mechanism<\/strong>: Don\u2019t keep it to oneself. Reach out to people and confide in them.\nFind a trusted person – a family member, a friend. Share truthfully and it can\nhelp one deal with the loneliness and isolation and get a fresh perspective.\nOne may create a network of people going through a similar situation and help\neach other come out of it together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

               Plan an\nexit strategy: <\/strong>If things feel like they are going out of hand and may not\nbe manageable or treatable, remember that no one deserves to be in a toxic\nrelationship. One has a right to a warm, considerate and caring relationship.\nDo not believe otherwise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

              Seek professional help: <\/strong>One should not wait for things to get out of hand, and seek\nprofessional help before it is too late. Emotional abuse can lead to mental\ndisorders like depression, anxiety and stress related issues. One should find a\ntrained psychologist or a mental health counsellor and seek help. Counsellors\nare trained to analyse situations like this, and help understand where any\nabusive behaviour might be coming from and how one can work together to move\ntowards a more mutually respectful and healthy relationship.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

              \u201cMy husband constantly calls me names, mocks me, ignores what I have to say, humiliates me in front of the family and then pretends as if nothing has happened and goes on to laugh and enjoy the dinner that I cooked for him and his family with so much effort and love. He is constantly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":455,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-454","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","entry","has-media"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=454"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":564,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454\/revisions\/564"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/455"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=454"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=454"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mindyog.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=454"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}